Ya gotta be brave to move forward

I just have a few words today. I feel like for the past five years I have felt unlike myself, Though I have had so many incredible moments of growth and immense happiness I just felt like something was missing. I think what i am realizing now is that I was missing. I was living in this place of purgatory. A place I thought I had to stay and all the while I thought I was courageous, really what I realize today is that it takes courage to change and shift and believe in so much more that you thought you could and I feel this incredible gratitude for my children who bring me tears of joy everyday. Tonight they spent 45 mins. straight wrestling and though my son who is the younger of the two children plays a bit wrough with his sister, I knew that they had no intension of hurting each other they were laughimng so hard they were crying. It was so amazing watching them and I thought to myself that mamas are the luckiest people on earth because we love with every fiber of our beings. WE LOVE OUR CHILDREN!!!!! In every moment of frustration when we want to cry or scream we are instantly humbled by our grattitude to hold this love to care and guide and be guided. Lasts nIght my daughter was reading a book to her little brother and the book was about a family who had a home birth. In the book there was a page that discribed how happy the big sister was when she realized that she had a litle brother to love and my daughter Hauna looked at her little brother and said "Teva this is how I felt when you were born", then she kissesd him and he said, "hauna, I love you". Oh my heart melts. So much is changing around me my hope is growing my beliefs are changing I am so ALIVE and GREATFUL!!!!!